Okay guys, before reading any of this, I would like to point out that I'm of Catholic raising, which kinda sorta makes me Catholic myself (no practicing, but I agree with the doctrine), but also a follower of objectivism (yes, the Ayn Rand one) and raised in a country known for producing deadpan snarkers like it's nobody's business (mi Chile lindo). With that in mind, my response over the next "article" is way more emotional than rational and in some ways not taking itself too seriously,

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